Young and Beautiful
by ruby-olivia
Summary: A twist on the story of Naomily during and after the time Skins Fire took place in 2013. Essentially, this Fan Fic begins part way through skins Fire when Emily returns to London and includes in Chapter one how she finds out about Naomi's cancer. It's written from the viewpoints of Naomi and Emily over many chapters.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Emily:

I can't breathe right now. I'm only thinking things to myself, it's not as if i'm actually speaking to someone right now, but yet I'm breathless. A combination of Naomi's beauty and the shock of her near death condition stop every gasp of air I reach for. I'm laying here in my dying girlfriends arms, overwhelmed by anger and love and depression. It's all gathered into a cluttered sea of emotions that is bearing down on me.

I only found out about my girlfriends terminal illness 28 hours ago. I was sitting in a coffee shop with my boss, having Chai tea. She was looking over my portfolio, talking about my receiving a possible promotion. 'My cell buzzed on the cushion next to my leg and i ignored it. Just thinking that now: for the first three times my phone vibrated, i ignored it. I ignored Effy's call to tell me that Naomi was in the hospital. Three minutes lost right there. If I had just picked up the phone when it first went off, I could have been on the plane three minutes sooner, and at her side three minutes sooner.

I put my tea latte on the side table and asked my employer to pardon me. I answered the call, speaking through gritted teeth, "Effy, not right now I can't talk I-" "Emily this is more important than whatever the fuck you're doing, would you please just shut up for a sec and listen to me?" God I have never heard someone, especially Eff, sound so emotional and urgent. Shocked, I didn't say anything. She got the cue and began to talk to me from thousands of miles away, slowly. Delicately. Like she thought I would break. The upset in her voice made my heart drop into my stomach. "Emily. It's time for you to come home now."

"What? Effy I'm in the middle of school and my job-" Again, she cut me off. "I get it Ems but this-. Naomi needs you." There was silence there, after those words, for what felt like minutes. As if Effy hadn't planned what she was going to say, and then was having trouble saying her unplanned speech. And then she spoke a small peep, raspy like a sob, but she said it in one fell swoop. One quick blow to get it over with. "Naoms is sick, she has cancer."

I couldn't breathe. My hand went up to my mouth in disbelief and I let out a small cry. At seeing this, my boss left the seating area and went up to the counter for another cup of whatever she was having. I was motionless. A million things were making my head spin. "How long?" I managed to spit out into the phone, tears streaming down my face, landing on my arms like salty cold bullets. "It's been quite a while. Months. Her doctors just concluded that her sickness is terminal.." At hearing this my eyes slammed shut, forcing even more salt bullets out of my eyes. My mouth quivered. Immediately I became angry with her for not telling me when she first knew but I couldn't address that then, when I was sitting awfully silent in that little cafe, with my ginormously important boss breathing down my neck, clearly wondering what the fuck I was blubbering my arse off about. The last I could get out was a hurt, "How could you, Effs?"

I heard her cry she was sorry right as I closed the phone.

Less than a minute had gone by and in that one minute alone, my entire life was flipped upside down. The love of my life, the life we shared, our love, slipped through my fingertips as i sat there for an extra long moment shuddering. Staring at my closed cell. I sniffled and quickly tried to pretend I had been calm and collected the entire time. I pretended a professional composed smile to the executive sitting next to me. "I'm sorry, please excuse me." I gathered up my handbag and albums clumsily and shimmied out of the space to the door.

Crying hysterically and fumbling with my things like a clown, I flagged a taxi as quickly as I could without getting myself run over. I got inside the first one before it even stopped and stuttered with such haste I'm surprised the driver understood what I was saying, "JFK as quickly as possible please. Erm wait the airport, JFK airport, It's urgent, Okay?" That jolly New York taxi driver just chuckled a little at me and my flubbering and started rolling. "It's fine dear, please just relax. I'll get you there as fast as I can if it's the last thing I do. Okay?" I sniffled like a mad man and wiped my face on my long sleeve. I had only been outside for a few moments before being in the taxi, but it was cold enough on that dark city street to realise now that I had left my coat in the coffee shop in such a hurry. The man turned the dial on the heat after seeing me in the rearview trying to catch a chilly breath. I soon felt the warm blow on my skin and then let out a breath I must have been holding for a while without even noticing. He left me alone after that, obviously knowing that I was an emotional wreck, and after a few silent minutes on the road he had turned on the quiet radio, crackling a bit, and then tuning into a beautifully soft voice singing "Young and Beautiful".


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Naomi:

Did you hear that I have cancer? Needless to say, I get to lay in this cold fucking bed being a miserable slug until I die. Hoorah.. My twelfth floor hospital room is so freezing that my teeth chatter constantly. I have to piss in bed and then wait for some nurse to come and clean me up. Effy's been doing her best looking after me, despite all the shit she has going on with her own life and family and doesn't leave here most nights. I know that because I lay awake and cry in my own mind, turned away from her of course, while she sleeps every night leaning on my bed.

While I literally lay motionless in my death bed, she's pacing back and forth outside my glass windowed room, crying to someone on the phone. I would bet a thousand pounds that the person on the other end of the call is either Emily or my mother. The reason I say that is, I haven't told either of them about my cancer yet. Now would be a better time than any to let them know, since thirty minutes ago, two doctors just waltzed in here and told me and Effs that I have, at most, a month to live.

Terminal cancer is bollocks since I miss my girlfriend more than anything and I know that if I don't get better, then I can never be with her. At least not...like that..again. Being like this sucks. I'm tough Naomi, I have thick skin. Until three years ago when Emily and I got together, no one could really break my shell and see my raw emotions. But that girl brings out the beast in me. Four years ago this cancer bull shit wouldn't have even phased me. I would have been able to light up a cigarette and shrug it off. Obviously I'd care a bit for myself, but not nearly as much as I do. For a person who's going to die sooner than later, and at the peak of my youth, the bulk of the crying I do is for Emily.

After a short minute on the phone Effy's cries soften and she closes the cell, in a lost hopeless way. She continues her pacing though, even though she's obviously not talking to anyone anymore. Who ever else is out in the hospital halls at six thirty on a Sunday evening must think she's bloody mad. I made the poor girl start going to a psychologist again ever since bad things started happening to her and me and she started staying out all night at the hospital with me and then going off to a stressful job bright and early. I slam my eyes shut and pretend to be in a deep still sleep when she turns for by room door. She walks into the room and closes the door behind her. My eyes are shut, but from the silence of her feet and the sigh in her breath I know she just rolled her eyes a little bit, knowing that I was just trying to eavesdrop on her. "I know you're up Naoms.." I open My eyes and shrug a little. What did she expect from me? I have a no good illness, but I'm still the same nosy lady. "Who was it?" I squeeze out. After the short words I'm shocked that at the end of a day I need to catch my breath. Effy laughs a little. "Why is it your business?" She think's she's witty or something. Being witty and being a smart arse are two totally different things. "I know it was Ems. I told you not-"

"Naomi you stubborn bitch she _has_ to know! She fucking loves you!" I should have known she would play that card. I wish I had some sort of rational rebuttal to hurl right back at her, but she's right. It's time that she knows.

Effy thinks I'm some awful selfish bitch for not telling Emily, who is my fucking soul mate, that I'm sick. I know she does her best for me, but she could never understand my position on this. Which is that, I love Emily so much that no matter how sick I am, and no matter how mad she will be when she finds out, I don't care. Because if I told her and she came to me, I'd feel lovely and awful. Lovely because all i want to do before i die is hold her. And Awful because she worked so fucking hard to be where she is in New York right now. She's going to do great things if I don't stand in her way. If I told her, that's exactly what I would be doing.

Finally after seven seconds of thinking all of that crap to myself I scrounge up the endless thought into words. "What did she say..?"

Effy looks down at her pretty little shoes. "Not much. She's pretty angry at me, she just hung up." I looked around with my eyes after she said that. I don't really know exactly what that means. She's angry? At me? or Eff? Herself? God I hope not. I decide that it's best I talk to her myself. I'm honestly so eager to hear her voice I could ring her right now. But I don't. What stops me is that I haven't felt my best all day. I sound like utter shit. While she's all worked up like this I don't want to freak her out even more, so I'll just call her in the morning when I'm feeling...Fresher. I can't even tell if this decision is actual, or just another excuse not to tell the love of my life the truth about it. "I'll call her myself in the morning." Effy sits down in the cushioned chair next to me and puts her hand on mine. We sit there, just like that until she closes her eyes and tilts her head down. After I see that she's relaxed I close my eyes and think. About Emily and our time during college, and in Goa together. Fuck how I miss her.

I love her so much, the sadness I feel twenty four hours a day is inspired by her. Every time I imagine her heartbroken, crying face standing next to my grave, I sink into a deep hole of shit. My love for her is so deep it almost makes me sick. I'd die for her, and she knows it. I know she says she would die for me and that's why i cannot bring myself to ring her. She's my soul mate, my first and only love. I've loved her since I was twelve, and she's finally been mine for all these years. We've been through so much together, and now, once what should be the hardest part of our journey, is over, another hard trek is just ahead. She's such a loving, wonderful person that she would actually sacrifice a life and future of success to spend my final thirty days with me. No matter how miserable or upsetting those days would be she wouldn't ever leave me. She would die for me. And she can't.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Emily:

The second my plane touched down in London I didn't have a clue what I was doing. The soonest flight to London had been at 8:00 this morning. I had no luggage, no destination, and barely any money. I stayed the night at the airport in the co-ed bathroom where I knew no one would bother me. I spent the bulk of what was on my debit card, on last minute airfare to London from New York. I didn't have to make the baggage claim pit stop, so I went straight outside to the pickup area where all the cars were, again, forgetting that I was without a coat. I knew it was cold but I almost didn't care, I was moving so quickly. I Paid a cab driver fourteen pounds to get me to the hospital.

When I was there, outside the hospital, I mean, I just stood there and looked at the doorway for way longer than I needed to. I couldn't take in what the fuck was actually happening to my life. Just a few years ago, I didn't even know Naomi. Fuck I didn't even know I was gay then. I am, or think I am, or was maybe, a rational sane person. But just yesterday at this time, I was out and about taking photographs of important, and unimportant people walking the same New York streets. And today, twenty hours later, I'm back in London. Without even thinking for a second I ran out of my life and was on my way to her. I didn't even know I could ever love anybody so much. I was gaping at an automatic glass door, the kind I'm used to seeing every day, but if felt like I was gazing into a black hole. Empty.

When I finally rounded up enough bravery to actually enter the building, I was told to take the lift up twelve floors to where Naomi Campbell's room was. Effy wasn't there visiting yet. It was only 2:00 in the afternoon, so she must have still been at work. I could see my beautiful girlfriend laying in her bed sleeping right through the glass windows on the outer wall of her room.

She looked drained, obviously not like herself. Her head was nearly bare, where her glossy brown locks used to be. Now left from her chemo treatments was a pale scalp with the occasional spot of brunette fuzz. I hadn't come all that way in such a rush just to gape and stare at her beauty from the other side of a window, but that's exactly what I was doing. With one deep breath, I stepped inside. She must have now been too soundly asleep, because she turned right over and began to mumble something. She jerked up a little when her blue eyes saw my face and I almost dropped dead right there. Could you imagine with her having cancer and all, my just falling dead right there in front of her because of those piercing blue eyes. So soft and harsh at the same time it made me shudder. Even though she was suffering, and didn't look the same in every aspect, she was stunning.

"Emily I-" She began to say something to me in that crying little voice but I was too busy collapsing into her bed to listen. I wrapped my arms around her thin fragile frame and thought they'd have to pry me off her with the jaws of life before i'd ever let her go. "I know. We're just going to lay here for a while. Okay" I told her.

"Whatever you say Mrs. Campbell," she replied. Her humor still wasn't tainted. Effy told me her comedic career was really lifting off. We laid there and fell asleep until now.

I woke up thirty minutes ago, and Effy has been on her cell in the corridor outside for the entirety of that time. I've just been sitting here running my hand down the side of Naoms' face crying silently and taking in every ounce of her endless beauty. I could lay here for a million more hours dreaming about her and Goa and she and I in Goa..We used to Skype and talk on the phone all the time about our future. About how as soon as my photography career had begun we would travel to as many places as we could and move away to Italy and just be in love for the rest of our lives. That was the plan, to be in love and nothing else. Being in the hospital was definitely not planned.

After a bit Effy noticed I was awake and going in and out of crying and shit. She walked in and didn't say a word. She just hugged me and we fell into each others sobs. Finally she put her hands on my shoulders and helped me out of that crying slump, and said to me, "That was a specialist on the phone. They want to speak to all of us tomorrow."

"What for?"

"I don't have a clue. I couldn't even tell from the tone of his voice if he needs to tell us something good or bad. He was just, neutral. Said it's something we have to see."

"Tomorrow? I don't have any clothes or a place to stay or anything. When exactly?"

Effy started shaking her head and smiling. "Don't worry about that stuff. My friend- Naomi's friend Dom is bringing over more things of hers tomorrow morning on his way to work. He said he would get some clothes of mine for you. And I've made arrangements for you to stay the night in the family room down the hall." She said gesturing behind me.

I was awfully mad at Effy before, and I still am, but I just hug and thank her for that. She has everything worked out and after hearing her plans and that she has everything sorted and under control, I know that she has been taking good care of Naoms. If I couldn't be with her all of this time, Effy was really the next best person to be at her side.

She walked me to the family room where I was allowed to stay as long as I needed. And then she left so she could rest for work. I fell asleep the second I hit the bed. It's not the softest thing ever but I was exhausted. I couldn't sleep on the plane or anything, and it felt like I had been tired for a thousand years. I melted into the mattress and didn't wake up until someone knocked at the door. I shot up out of sleep and my eyes wide open, squinted once I realised how bright it was. In the dark I didn't notice last night that the blinds in the room were wide open.

I got up and pulled a sweatshirt over my bare chest and it hung past my knickers so I could answer the door without whoever it is, thinking I'm some sort of hospital stripper. I opened the door and right at eye level with me was a well dressed little curly haired man. "Dom. Hello, Emily? I-I Hope?" He held out his free hand. Cradled in his other arm was a big brown paper bag. I shook his hand and he walked in. "Effy told me to bring you these things. I hope you don't mind if I scoot, I'm in a rush. Always in a rush." He smiled nervously like I'd bite. He must think I'm like Eff. She's the scary one. "No it's fine absolutely. Thanks so much for this..and for being around for Naomi when I..-"

"Hey look it's fine. She's hilarious anyways, it's barely depressing to spend time with her, it's almost as if she isn't sick," he said back. I couldn't help but smile. Her spirit really rubs off on everyone and makes them feel wonderful, and I'm a victim of that.

"She talks about you all the time, you know.." He said to me, like he knew I obviously knew all about that but thought I wouldn't remember. "She loves you. Alot.. I wished I loved someone that much. Fuck. I wish someone loved me as much as she loves you." With this he smiled and shut the door behind him. Leaving me in a plain bright room with a full brown bag of effys shit.

In the bag there were two pairs of pants, for legs longer than mine, a tee, sweater, a pair of sneakers and a fresh toothbrush and toothpaste. He's a good little curly man. I got dressed and fixed my hair the best I could. I had to roll the legs of Effy's pants up about four times so that they didn't look to long, I'm significantly smaller than her. As freshened up as I could be in this situation, I left my room with mine and Effy's things, and walked down to Naomi.

She was sitting up in her bed, buttoning a denim shirt when I got there. I walked in and put my things on a chair. "Hey babe," I said. She turned over her shoulder and shot me the most beautiful smile I've ever seen. "Hello little miss, how was your snooze? Dream of Orange scooters in goa?" Exactly.

"Fine, it's chilly in here."

"Tell me about it. No matter how much we ask about getting the heat cranked up in this joint, someone's always 'workin on it.' Whatever," She pulled a white earflap winter hat over her fuzzy head and stood up, walked over and pulled me straight in for the best fucking kiss of my life. She must be a morning person now, because she wasn't as chipper last night. More emotional, less passionate. This kiss elt like I was drunk out of my brains, standing on a beach, naked with fireworks going off so close to my skin I felt the heat. Electric.

After our extended moment of absolute passion, she gripped my hands and said to me, "Well let's get on with it, shall we? Eff is going to meet us there when she has a break. Kay?"

I was still so lost in that kiss that I forgot for a moment that she was talking, seriously, about the doctors appointment. "Yes right. We Shall." And we practically skipped out of there, just in love and glad to be alive, for however long we could be.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Naomi:

Ems and I stopped at a little joint for tea on our way to my appointment. Even though Emily and I were having the most splendid of times this morning, I could tell that she was concerned about what the doctor might tell us. More concerned than me, to be honest. I wasn't really worried about what the fuck that dickhead had to say. Could it get any worse? I have a month to live at most, so first of all, whatever he tells us can't be any worse than that, and secondly, I'm not going to wasn't another second feeling sorry for myself or anything.

When we got to the office, Effy was outside the entrance with a lit cigarette in her mouth. We saw her before she saw us, and I can frankly say I was the only one who wasn't freaked about this. She tossed it on the ground and walked inside with us. "You ready?" She smiled and took my free hand, Emily had the other. I wasn't nervous for me, but I didn't need Emily to be there when I was given bad news. Fuck me, I guess I had to be ready..for her.

"Ah Naomi! Down the hall, second door on the left," the almost too-fucking-chipper receptionist said to us. Shit this is real. The three of us kept on walking, hand in hand in hand, towards my ever upsetting fate. Emily's hand got significantly tighter around mine, and I couldn't bring myself to look at her face, she could make me go from zero to sixty on an emotional level, without even trying.

Effy took the liberty of opening the door and ushering the two of us in, I bet she knew neither of us would be able to push open such a 'heavy' door. Doctor Pulaski got up our of his fancy leather chair straightaway, "Hello dear how are we today?" His eyes found Em. "Ah! Judging by this pretty face of yours, you must be the one and only Emily Fitch I've been hearing so much about lately," Emily blushed. She was too nervous to do anything but be uncomfortable. I wanted to get on with it too. "Please Please have a seat, all of you, yes," he returned to his chair as well.

"Now ladies I know you must be rather on edge about all of this, so I wont delay in telling you," He folded his hands. I honestly couldn't read his expression, psychology did me no fucking good, of course. I sat with my toes tapping and gripping my friends waiting for him to fucking finish up. "It appears that, Naomi's treatments have begun to have a slight positive effect," he said.

Emily let out a little cry I was sure could have very well been one of those cute little burps of hers, but she was clearly happy as fuck. Effy on my other side shook my hand back and forth and smiled her perfect smile through her small cries. We were interrupted in our dreamy moment of thanks. "Now please, don't get your hopes too high. This may not change anything..It does mean however that all hope is not lost as we thought. Having hope left may not be hopeless..after all..And thats all there is to it. Naomi, We'll continue with treatments, and I'll see you in five days. Make your appointment on your way out?" And he left the room so we could be together in tears of happiness. We all got up for an impromptu group hug, one that I was glad to be a part of. Emily was grinning her thin mouth and Effy was nodding saying that all of their praying paid off. I didn't know Effy knew what a fucking prayer was. I couldn't stop smiling no matter how hard I tried to return from cloud nine. Treatments were working a bit now, but it didn't mean I had any more time to be around.

I made my appointment for this coming Monday and we all got out of there. Effy left back to work once we walked out. She said she had an appointment she couldnt miss with the NSA. Fuck me I had totally forgotten about all her personal trouble, and Emily didn't even know yet. Oops. Emily gave me a confused look as Effs walked away, but I just dragged her with me into a quaint little tea spot down the road. We sat down and ordered some food for lunch and got talking. Her showing me photos on her phone and explaning about all the photoshoots she's been doing at her new internship. It was nice to hear about, but it was making me depressed because she wasn't there anymore, she was here. so she was pretty much showing me everything she could be doing rather than sitting with her dying girlfriend in a cheap cafe. I changed the subject over to Effy.

"She's fine you know, she didn't do anything."

"Since when is Effy not guilty as charged?" she shot back, seeing right through my plain-faced lie. Fuck.

"Just work trouble, she tells me not to be concerned about it." That's the truth, but it didn't satisfy Emily. She didn't only need the truth but the whole story. So I told her, about how Dom is in love with her and slipped her a tip off about some stock thing. She knew that was illegal, and now she's going to be punished for it. She asked me softly what's going to happen when people find out what the fuck she did. And I told her the truth, again, god I love her way to much. "She'll go away, Ems. What else? This is some big deal apparently. I try not to fucking think about it."

"How soon ya think?" That's tricky, Effy keeps it rather vague on that part. "Don't know babe. Let's just not worry about it until the day comes, okay?" She nodded and sipped her soup. Wow I was jealous of fucking soup. I hope I don't die so that I could fucking be with her, finally. All that fanny time I missed when she was in New York, and now that shes back it's a big tease. I still can't have her. When I'm better she'll be my pajamas again every night, we'll eat Garibaldi and drink rum every meal of the day, and move away some place photogenic and romantic. Fuck I can't wait. But for now, I'll just wait and see how it all goes, and watch her slurp her lucky arse soup.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Emily:

It's been two weeks since Naomi got her good news from the doctor about her condition and she's doing so fucking well I can't believe it. Every once in a while I wake up and I've forgotten that she's not dying anymore, and I have to bring myself back down to earth and take in all of these wonderful moments with her. Since they let her come back to her flat we've slept in each others arms every night. Most of the time I can't even sleep I just lay there in my underwear and look at her with tears in my eyes. She's looking better and better every day. Her head fuzz getting a bit longer and her baby blues a bit brighter every time I see her.

"Ems? What the fuck babe!"

I hadn't even realized I was off in some trance while she made us tea. "Sorry what?"

"Do you want a biscuit too I said?"

"No no I'm fine, sorry," Obviously, Naomi has always been beautiful, an absolute knockout. But lately, I've been hopelessly deprived of my fanny time, and realizing more and more how much I want her in bed. I know how awful that must sound, being so fucking greedy while shes fighting death, but she's just so fucking irresistible, I can't help but dream.

We sat down and had our tea talking about our plans for the day and what we needed to pick up at the store and things. We changed out of our pajamas in the bedroom and then got out of the flat into London. We've been together for so long now we don't mind changing in front of each other, obviously. The first time she'd taken her shirt off near me she told me not to look, but when I did take a sneaky look at her delicious bum and bare back she didn't scold me or anything. That was years ago. Now she's all mine and I see her every morning in her knickers and her body is just the sweetest fucking thing.

We went out to the market and got fruit and eggs and fresh foods and things and walked around the cute part of London, holding hands and pointing out adorable places, making mental notes for date nights. London isn't all gorgeous or anything lovely in particular, but even the buildings with things growing on them and cracks in the walls are so photogenic. I love looking at things like that, but all of the photo opportunities make me miss photography. I had barely any money when I got to New York so I couldn't ever save enough to buy my own camera. At the internship I had snatched they let me go around and take pictures with one of their hot expensive company cameras.

After enough walking around drooling over Naomi's beauty and the city's combined I couldn't take it anymore. We stopped into an electronics store a few blocks from the market and I ended up buying one of those cheap 10 megapixel pocket cameras. It will work just fine for capturing moments of Naomi to remember forever. I bought it pre-charged, so right when we got back on the street I was taking pictures again. It was great, Naomi has never really gotten to see me in the zone before, all squinty behind a little black box, clicking buttons at her posing figure. There's not a second of being with her that I ever intend to forget. The camera was full thirty minutes before we even got back to the flat.

When we did get there, I hooked it up with the little-pluggy-thing and we started looking at the shots from our miniature outing while Naoms multi tasked and put the groceries away at the same time. The camera is pretty crappy, I'm not complaining, the pictures I got were pretty alright, honestly. Especially since I was able to get my hands on the fucking hottest model in the country. Naomi's looking so perfect in all these photos, like a professional model. We sat on the couch watching some Television movie, all cuddled under a fuzzy blanket, looking at our pictures of the town and Naomi, perfect. Literally perfect. We did almost nothing productive today. Neither of us have paying jobs, we're probably going to run out of money pretty soon, and all we did was wander around laughing and taking pictures, pick up one single bag of food, and it was the most fun we had since we went to Goa.

"Hey Naoms?" She was sitting next to me smiling and giggling quietly at something that a black and white child said on the Tele. "Yeah babe,"

"What do you think of blogs?" that sounded so much less-stupid inside my fucking head.

She had the funniest cutest look on her face, "What?" she burst out laughing like she didn't even understand what I was talking about. I didn't either, frankly, I hadn't even thought about what I was saying.

"What if we start a blog with these photos, and like, stories and things of what we do and how we live and get through this," She looked up at me after that, longer sentence than I had planned to say but what can you do when you get on a little rant roll, yeah?

"Get through what Ems?"

"Well we're kind of going against the whole world right now, we're partners and you're fighting fucking cancer. We might inspire people, you know?"

"Why would people want to hear about our sob story?" Fuck is she getting pissed?

"I just mean you're beautiful and these pictures show it. We could make a website with these and tell a real story, none of the fairytale crap, just the truth and people would love it, yeah?"

"Yeah you're right about the story thing, and the ones of London people would love. Your fucking talent would make people crazy and all, but I don't think in my condition...it's not something people want to see. It's not beautiful."

What the fuck is she even saying, she's the most beautiful woman in the world. Skin like porcelain and her bright blue dagger eyes. She still has her slender curves and her hair is getting longer and starting to curl around the tops of her ears. The most beautiful thing in the world, so great to look at that I could cry right now just thinking of it.

I didn't realize how long I was silent, I guess I wasn't saying any of that out loud or anything, fuck. I also didn't realize that tears started welling in my eyes and my bottom lip started to curl a little. i wasn't even sad...just utterly intoxicated and she didn't understand.

"Ems you're crying," Yeah sorry I don't even know why.

"What? Oh, yeah sorry,"

"Babe okay we can make the website I don't care it's fine I-"

"No I'm not crying over the stupid website," I laughed and she helped me wipe my tears, smiling a little. "It's just...Naoms I almost lost you. And now these pictures..I'm just proud, I want to show you off. These are great, you look wonderful, other people should see that you can overcome this, and you look beautiful and powerful. That's all."

We were both laughing our asses off. I feel like such an idiot. I love her, and she knows that, for sure, but I still get embarrassed when I make a fool of myself obviously.

"We'll do it. Done. Yes." she said. Wow what a doll. I didn't think she'd actually let me flaunt my hottie of a girlfriend to lazy internet people.

Well with that we got started looking at free online websites and templates to use for our new website. We started posting the photos from when we met and from Goa, and telling the story from both of our points of view about the struggle that we went through during college, and all the good things about our relationship, and the current state of us. How we're getting through this. I hope we can end up helping out young lost girls like we were, and also people going through the same thing as Naoms.

It was like 10:00 when we decided to stop working on the computer and go to bed. In her state, she was obviously in no shape to get it on tonight. We just kissed a bit and laid together, all warm with each other in the cold flat. Like I said, it was late at night by then, and someone still made a stink and knocked on the fucking flat door. Disturbing me and my girlfriend, who were trying, like normal people do at night, to fall asleep. But fuck it, this person was pounding on the door, and no matter how much we tried to ignore it, we had to get out of bed, and answer the fucker.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Naomi:

Now, I'm not blind, and I know my girlfriend well enough to know that she's aching for some action! And so am I thank you very much, and since we haven't been able to "go at it" for quite a while now, even our snuggle time before bed is sacred to the both of us. So, with that, What the fuck was this person thinking, knocking at our door at half past Ten at night? What the fuck?

Em and I wandered to the door, I went over to open it, and she hung out a few steps back, looking on intently, but drooping and leaning sleepily against the wall. I opened the door and was surprised, (my expecting some late night street scum looking for some place to crash a night), to see a dapper looking young man and woman. The woman looked at me with big teeth and her mouth slightly agape at me and my girlfriend, both just partially clothed. "Oh, wow, lovely," She smiled daintily.

"Yeah what do ya want?" I said. They looked decent but still it was fucking late.

The young man had a rosy mouth and was dressed in a pea coat and matching olive green sweater and scarf. "Hello, urm, We're lookin for Effy Stonemspslace..I'm Tony?"

I had never met Effy's brother, but she did talk about him a lot, even back during college. Short mentions of a mental break he had back then after being in an accident of sorts, I can't really remember. Anyways, the moment he said Effy's name, a glob of shitty guilt rose in my throat. I mean, Effy did sometimes stay out late and was usually gone in the morning, when she did come home, or she stayed at her boyfriends house for a few nights. But suddenly I was realizing that with me and Emily off adventuring a bit lately, I hadn't heard from or seen Eff in ages. What kind of best friend am I, Honestly..

"Uh yeah, come in. Sorry, it's a bit..messy." I said to the visitors, and stepped to the side a bit to let them in the flat. They walked towards the lounge and looked around a bit slowly looking at things around the place. Emily introduced herself, and then went to the bedroom to put some pants on.

The boy spoke again. His slender friend just wandered and gazed some more, strange but polite, I guess. "Sorry to come so late, this is Cass by the way. Not sure if Effs talked about us too much, I'm her brother." I could see that, they had the exact same harsh eyes, but he wasn't as jarring or harsh looking. Didn't look quite like he was going to pounce just yet.

"Yeah she mentioned you. I don't know if I've heard of your lady friend, but yeah. What can I do ya two for?" Motioning around me to the flat. Effy did pay for this place, it was hers after all, so her home must be his home too.

"We actually came to get some things of hers, but the travel was far and we underestimated the length of our trip..got here a bit later than planned.."

Fuck. They they came to get her stuff. What does that mean?

"I'm sorry, her things?" I missed something..

Tony looked at Cass, then past me to Emily, who just walked back into the room with trousers on. "Effy's in prison..I'm sure you heard. She does get in trouble a bit. Well, our mum was too out of it and pissed so she sent me, and Cass just came along, you know-"

"I'm sorry, what? Prison?" Em walked closer to me, both of us were shit puzzled and all.

"Yeah? Run in with the NSA, did her some illegal shit, as usual. You didn't know?"

I opened my mouth to talk but Em beat me to the punch. "Yeah, we fucking knew, but last we heard she was just being investigated, not imprisoned. Why didn't anyone call us?" I touched her hand a little to reassure her, she was getting a bit heated at hearing all this shit. She clenched mine in hers.

"Wow, hey, Sorry, when we came we assumed you knew, being her best mates.." The girl, Cass, practically whispered.

Emily walked off after saying, "Yeah, whatever, I'll make up the beds, we'll take the couch then. Yeah babe?" I let her hand go, and she walked off, pissed, and sassily moving that rockin bum she had on her. I shook my head out of the pervish thought.

"Yeah, ya two can crash here tonight and we'll help you pack her stuff up in the morning, I guess."

Tony smiled and nodded, taking off his coat. Before I went to help Ems make up the guest beds, Cass said, "Wow Lovely, thanks."

Didn't she already.. "Didn't you already say that?" She just gave a cheeky grin and plopped onto a chair in the lounge.

I turned to go back towards the rooms and then spun on my heel for a sec, "Can I urm, get ya anything? A beer maybe? Oh and we've got some Garibaldis in the cupboard."

Tony was the polite one, "I'm fine, got me spliff. And Cass here doesn't eat much, thanks though."

Cass looked over her shoulder, "When I get hungry enough though," and gave a crazy little look.

What the fuck..okay. I went back to my walking and helped Emily in the other room.

When we were done making beds up we showed our guests their rooms, gave them towels and showed them where the shower and toilet is and then left them be. Em took off her trousers again, she can't sleep in pants, silly little lezza, and we crashed on the wide part of the couch and fell asleep the second we hit it.

I couldn't help but think of Effy. Her brother said she was in fucking jail and I was too preoccupied to notice that she hadn't been home in what. Like five days. I was too busy drooling over my petite little lady friend to realise that she was gone for way longer than usual and hadn't ringed the flat or anything. I started to feel awful and my stomach bothered me. I just wondered a lot just how long she had been in there and I hadn't noticed. Emily sure does know how to distract me from reality, even without fucking at all. Fuck she had me good. I wonder even what she still likes me for. I don't make any money and apparently I'm not even that great a friend to anyone, I'm a sarcastic bitch and a stoner. Eh. she loves me, even if I can't sort why. I hadn't realized how late into the night I was bothering myself about all of this shit with Effy. Nearly half past one in the morning. Emily's head stirred in my lap, and her eyes opened. I tilted my head down and met her glance.

"Hey Naoms, Whatcha doin babe?" she rubbed her weary glittering eyes.

"Just can't sleep, worrying for Eff and things. You can go back to sleep yeah?"

She looked at me and I kept looking down at her perfect thin mouth. Her cheeks perfectly chiseled and sculpted around her lovely bones. It was dark in the flat but I knew her face so well, it was perfectly lit.

"Don't feel bad Naoms, she's fine. She told you not to worry, so don't. She knows what she's doing, yeah?"

"Yeah and I'm bloody sure she knows plenty of friends who are in prison," I replied, feeling lighter and reassured about the subject.

Emily's face scrunched and she giggled, big smile. She reached up with her hands enveloped in the sleeves of her sweater, and held my face down to her lips and brushed them against mine in the most delicate loving kiss. I shifted so I wasn't sitting up anymore, and we re-adjusted holding eachother face to face, she buried her head in the crook of my neck. Her breath on my ear and the tips of her fingers lightly on the back of my neck still had me with butterflied in my stomach and goosebumps on my skin.

"Em?"

"Mmm," I got in return.

"Thanks for talking me into your crazy website plan earlier, It's going to be good for us," I smiled, but she couldn't see, she was half asleep on my chest. She did grip me tighter in her arms, "You're too beautiful Naoms to not share you with the world."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Emily:

Naomi and I woke up on the couch pretty late, like 9:00 and the lounge was really bright. I was squinting immediately and wiggling blindly a bit trying to find a duvet or something to cover my face with again, but Naomi was hogging it.

"Hey. You. Naoms. Care to share a bit?" I talked right to her face next to me.

"Mmmmm," she said with her eyes closed. She moved like a little blind puppy and lifted her arms from under it, and rolled over towards me covering our faces with the duvet.

Her eyes blinked sleepily open, bright and blue right in front of mine. Was it too early in the day to want to fuck the daylights out of this beauty?

"Hey Emsy, how'd ya snooze babe?" Wow was she beautiful.

"Like shit, temperature's awful, company's even worse."

"HA, that your slogan or something? I happen to think that our intimate sleeping arrangement was rather lovely, thank you very much."

"I don't disagree," I smiled a bit and she kissed me. Giggling and kissing like this under the duvet felt so right and relaxing. We were being totally lazy but we well needed the moment.

I was laying right above Naomi during all this and all of the sudden, we heard "Oh wow, lovely,"

Before that freaky girl had even spoken the first syllable, Naomi was startled and jerked up so suddenly, smashing her forehead into mine. Fuck.

We pulled the duvet off and looked around, and finally saw Cass sitting on the kitchen counter, smiling in her sun dress. She fucking waved.

Naomi rolled her eyes, I could tell she and I both knew it was going to be a long day.

After an awkwardly long silence of her staring us down, while we avoided her gaze, embarrassed of what she just saw, I said, "Your friend still sleeping?"

"Nope, he left," her smile didn't falter, she just spoke straight through it.

Before she had even finished her sentence really, smart arse Naomi sneered, "I can't imagine why…"

I couldn't help but let out a giggle, comedy classes had done her well, and she was pretty witty to begin with. Gorgeous and witty.

"Me neither," said Cass. She just stayed there and looked at us until I stood up and offered to make us three tea, and our visitor hopped gracefully off the counter. Naomi burrito wrapped herself in the duvet and fish flopped back down onto the couch. Cass skipped over and sat down right next to her while I made the drinks, and started patting her head.

"I like this," she said, petting her baby fuzzy head, "It suits you."

I couldn't help but smile a little at that. She was so clueless to Naomi's illness, but so sweet anyways.

"Cass you want milk?" I didn't know how she liked her tea.

"Oh wow, I'm alright thanks." I forgot she doesn't do the food thing. Oops.

Naomi mumbled from her face shoved in a pillow, "Where'd Tony go off to early like this Cass?"

"We forgot boxes. He left like. I dunno, thirty minutes ago, to get some from the store."

Fuck, I had forgotten we were packing up Effy's things today. "Oh yeah, what do we need to pack for her?" I asked.

"Tony says everything. She's allowed to have some clothes and personal things in prison since she had a mental breakdown, and they want her to feel comfortable-er."

Naomi leaned up and looked at me and Cass, "Another mental breakdown? You're kidding."

"No, we really have to pack everything," she said, totally clueless, and Naomi's immediate concern flew right over her head. "The rest of her things are going to her mum's."

"Why does her mum want her shit? After all the bad she caused during college, and then totally fucking shunning her and kicking her out, what the fuck?" I gave her a look to cool it a bit, it was too early in the morning for us to think of our friends' crisis, and the one after Freddy's murder, and Cook's disappearance. She got the hint. Cass kept going, "After Eff get's out, they won't let her go back to work in London, she'll go broke, and end up living back in Bristol. That's what Tony said."

"Yeah, I 'wanna talk to him, he better be back before my nap in ten minutes," Naomi said, getting up in her burrito and waddling into the kitchen and getting garibaldis.

As if on cue, Tony walked in the door quickly out of the cold corridor with about a thousand flattened boxes under each arm. He must have opened the door with his foot or something..

"Good morning, ladies, how'd you all sleep?" Charming sounding, charming looking, all around charming and things. At least Effy had one good family member to make sure she was taken care of. He dropped the boxes down and helped himself to a cup of tea, and he put the milk in first, just like Effy.

"Lovely," Cass said lightly. She sat down on the floor with the role of tape she found, somehow, in our junk drawer and started folding a box. She looked like a kitten with her legs covered by her dress. Tony smiled down at her, like she was a child playing on the floor.

Naomi put her hands on her hips, "Tony, I have a problem with this sir."

He just looked at her, puzzled, as if to say he were listening but uninspired.

"Why the fuck can't Effy just live with us when she gets out?" Tony's face turned pale and he motioned across his neck for her to shut up, she didn't. "It's her flat anyway, she picked it out just a few months ago, it's just the way she fucking left it."

Tony took both our arms and dragged us to the other side of the lounge. He looked fucking nervous, and peeked over his shoulder at Cass by the door, still clueless. He looked back at us and said, "Okay keep your mouths, shut, yeah?" Naomi looked at me, pissed as usual.

"What the fuck-" She started but he cut her off.

"Cass can't know, she loves Eff so much it's kill her. My baby sister is her big sister." He was really freaking out me and my girlfriend, who was still pissed off.

"Out with it then, bitch." She said to him.

He glared at her, something was hard for him to get out.

"Okay. It's looking like, Eff won't be out for..a while..sorry for not saying anything but-"

I couldn't help myself, again. "What the fuck!" What the fuck did he mean by a 'while'.

"Shhh Shut up, remember the deal? Cass cannot know," wow he must really love that kid, for trying so hard to keep her from this pain.

Naomi backed up my concern for our friend. "How long exactly?" Effy had been Naomi's backbone through all her struggle, while dealing with her own in secret. And with her mental background, I can't thank her enough for being able to keep it together while Naomi was facing a grim end. As much as I hated her for keeping everything from me, I owed her, and up until fourteen hours ago, we hadn't even been aware she was gone. The least we can do for her at this point is to get our shit straight and help her any way we can, from outside.

Tony shook his head a little and looked down, "She's in deep shit this time, quite a few millions, all made illegally, they're giving her at least six to eight years."

My heart dropped into my stomach at hearing that, I felt awful. Here I was just forty minutes ago rolling around with my girlfriend, without a care in the world, forgetting that there's things to do, and people who still have shit to deal with, no matter how good life seems. Things around us are always going down the shit hole. People including our best friend were struggling so much, and there was nothing we could even do about it except sit and wallow in it. Wallow in shit.

I stretched my fingers for Naomi's at our sides, and she took my hand.

I could tell from the sick look on her face that she could throw up. Her rock in all these rough waters lately was gone from her life for the better part of her young adulthood, so many years just flowed out of her life. If I felt shitty about it all, Naomi was feeling it ten times worse. Effy, no matter how fucked up, always looked out for Naoms.

I hadn't realized Cass stood up on the other end of the lounge and was staring blankly at us. Fuck. I tapped Tony and he whipped around, "No no no Cass no," she lost it.

"Six to eight years what, Tony? What the fuck?" As if I could feel worse, suddenly I did. I could see how much this hurt the girl, she went from zero to sixty in seconds. Her emotions flared out of her little body, and piercing eyes.

She didn't say anything to us, just looked around a bit and then said to him, with tears welling in her eyes, "How could you fucking let them do this to her? You're supposed to protect her. She needed you!"

Now his was a face full of pain, like someone had just stabbed him in the heart. His eyes screaming at her, _I wish I could have, I would give anything to help her, all that I could. But I cant. _

She didn't understand, that it was all out of his grasp. Anyone's really, uncontrollable.

"Cass I-"

"SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP, TONY," she widened her eyes, collecting herself. She doesn't seem like the type of girl to snap too often, she's pretty fucking bubbly, I bet she surprised herself with her words so powerfully angry.

Tony had the most heartbroken expression on his chiseled face, "Cass please there's nothing _I_ Could have done," he gestured around, "There's nothing _anyone_ could have done. I love her too, she's my sister. But she did this, she brought it on herself and now _we're _the ones living with her burdens and shit. So please, calm down. I don't think any of us need any more drama now, yeah?"

She gave him a long peaceful stare, eyes still wide of course. "Oh wow. But, fuck you."

She turned and walked away, a little more pep was in her step than you would expect someone to have after a heated conversation like that. She walked back towards the door and I swear, I thought she was going to up and wander out of the flat. But instead, she went over to one of the large boxes she had folded into a square. She put one foot in, then the other, sat down inside, and folded over herself, and closed the flaps.

I think we all knew who won the argument.


End file.
